My first booklist! It’s been on my mind for 3 years but it took posting on my Instagram account this summer to get it in gear. Nothing like being forced to write succinctly.
Here are the five books I’ve found super helpful in the teaching aspect of homeschool and how to deal with kids in the “classroom”. This is a bit different from parenting books, Montessori philosophy, or books specific to the logistics of homeschooling.
These books are a good read before you actually start homeschooling, and also worth getting out every few years to re-read. They give you a very good background on how people learn, techniques in learning, and how to implement discipline in the classroom. For example, the 10k hours practice rule? Not quite true.
I’ve used the ideas I read from these books in Thumper’s violin practice and also how to implement chores and classroom routine. Whenever I’m down with how frustrated I get with the kids, I reread the Positive Discipline and Non-Violent Communication books to get re-inspired.
For each book, I’ve linked to both Amazon and Books.com.tw (aff link) if a traditional Chinese translation is available. I’m sure some exists in simplified but most likely the titles are going to be different.
How We Learn by Benedict Carey
This book is divided into 4 sections. Part one talks about what memory is and why it’s important to forget. Part two talks about how to retain info. This was where I learned about spaced repetition. Makes you re-think our habit of studying the same subject every day. It also made me wondered if Montessori’s way of allowing the children to choose helps with that; does your brain subconsciously know what topics it is now most interested in learning and what it is tired of studying?
Part three is on how our brain solves problems and part four is how we learn without thinking and the importance of sleep. One tidbit that stuck with me was the importance of changing up your environment when you learn as the brain is re-engaged when something in its environment is different.
I remember thinking how most of these info is semi-intuitive. But I’ve found myself constantly thinking back to the book whenever I get stuck teaching the way I was taught. Habits are hard to break!
For example, the kids would not have the attention and focus for a few days and I would be so frustrated, then I change our routine up a little, and voila, problem solved. Of course, that’s when I remember that a change in environment helps.
Tog Dog by Po Bronson & Ashley Merryman
I’ve read almost every book by Po Bronso and they’re all good reads. The topic of this book is competition, how top athletes or musicians or anyone top of their field got there.
I’ve definitely applied some of what I learned from Top Dog and How We Learn in my approach in helping Thumper with her violin practice. I don’t know if I’m doing it right, but I do know at least it gets me away from the way I was taught to learn and practice.
For example, I no longer prescribe to the “just push through” approach. When she’s tired of practicing, I tend to think, “Well, her brain’s tired of the way she’s practicing so we should stop.” Whereas I was just taught as a kid to ignore my feelings and plough through everything. Or, I try to change how she practices to keep the brain engaged.
It’s kind of hard to go into the specifics because I don’t even remember the specifics of the book anymore. So maybe a better thing is to point out some of the more interesting chapter titles.
- What Goes Down When the Stakes Go Up
- How the Warriors Can Beat the Warriors
- Why Women Need Them and Men Don’t
- The Difference Between Winning and Not Losing
- Michelangelo Had an Agent
If you have a child in sports or play an instrument, this book is definitely worth a read.
The Power of Habits by Charles Duhigg
I first learned about habits from Eclectic Mama, who told me that Charlotte Mason emphasizes habits. Then I came across some articles on Montessori and realized that Montessori’s methods also have building of habits built in.
However as I’ve realized over the years reading different education philosophy, ultimately they all are very similar in many things; the difference is how the founder talks about it, and what they emphasize when they talk about implementation. So yes, Montessori has habits. Maybe it’s more framed in terms of practical life, having routine and rules and choices within it. Montessori tends to talk about observation and following the child more.
If you’re Lavender, who is a super amazing planner, then of course you don’t need to read this book. Otherwise, I highly recommend it for helping you establish a routine in the classroom and in the home. It takes away the frustration in your daily life when you realize most things are a habit issue.
But it took me about 3 years of homeschooling to figure out that routines and schedules and rules help set a framework, and how to implement it; with a lot of questions to Lavender of course. Ultimately I don’t do it the way she does it, because we are two very different people (another thing I had to learn). But things have been much better.
Feel like you nag the kids a lot? Have you established strong habits so they do it themselves? Kid makes the same mistake over and over again when playing an instrument? Did it accidentally become a habit and have you used the rules of practice mentioned in Top Dog to change their practice and establish a new habit?
Positive Discipline in the Classroom
For those of you not familiar with Positive Discipline, it’s a way of talking to children that does not involve punishment. In China it’s called 正面管教; in Taiwan it’s 正向教養 (at least the book titles are).
My biggest take away on implementing Positive Discipline is how I needed to be mindful, mindful of children’s feelings, mindful of my feelings, and to involve children in coming up with solutions. Otherwise this was the most frustrating of all my parenting books because I loved the philosophy but I just couldn’t implement it. Dialogues never run the way it’s portrayed and resolves itself immediately. And I didn’t know how to change the “recipe” so to speak, to make it work.
What’s unique about the classroom version is it gives you ideas on how to resolve conflicts amongst students, none of which I’ve ever implemented by the way. Ha! Partly because I don’t really have a roomful or even handful of kids to myself, even in co-op. Otherwise I probably would use it.
But I get the gist of it and I use it in other aspects of our life. Mainly, it’s about giving kids the control in solving their own issues by asking them for solutions during classroom meetings. I’ve seen this work in a Montessori class and it’s AMAZING.
I could not find the Chinese translation of the classroom version, so I linked to the regular Positive Discipline version; mostly because you’ll see that it comes with cards! From the previews of the cards, it seems to contain what you need to say for specific situations. That’s always the hard part for me, how to say things positively in Chinese. So having a book translate those for me really helps!
Non-Violent Communication in Schools
More than Positive Parenting, this is the philosophy I go back to again and again, as I find that it is not only helpful for your relationship with the children, but all relationships you will have in life.
Reading this book was an eye opener in the kinds of conversations I could have with children regarding school work. It is really a different way of thinking, where the focus is on hearing and empathizing with children’s needs.
For example, there’s a chapter where the author has a conversation with a child when they didn’t want to do certain math work. I don’t even know how to describe it. It was so unlike anything I’ve heard. You know usually when people ask “How do I get my kid to do some school work they don’t want to do?” the responses are mostly practical suggestions on how to coerce/convince the kid to do it. But this conversation did not go that way.
It’s just mind boggling, but in a good way. All I can say is read the book! I hope you’re as inspired as I was on how to approach your homeschooling classroom.
Peace education is a cornerstone of Montessori’s philosophy, she came out of two World Wars and was exiled to India for many years. It is one reason I’m so drawn to the philosophy, because she was not concerned with just educating a child academically. Especially in this increasingly combative world, a good way to implement peace education is to teach kids how to communicate the NVC way.
Why? Let’s say you send 2 kids to the peace table to work out their problems. But how do you guide them in having a very productive conversation? This is where Non Violent Communication comes in. And this way of communicating will greatly benefit them in other conflicts they will have down the line.
Though I do have to say, this way of communication is so non-standard, often the other party is resistant to it. People are used to arguing in a combative manner and it confuses them when someone really wants to understand how they feel and meet their needs.
I know I’m going on about classrooms here, but NVC does apply to a homeschooling class of just 2 kids. I credit my attempts at using NVC since the kids were toddlers when people tell me my kids get along well. Though of course it doesn’t feel that way; just yesterday I had to break up 3 different disagreements between Thumper and Astroboy.
Quick List of Books Reviewed
Here’s a listing of all the books I reviewed if you’re interested. Some of them even have ebooks!
